Aug 11, 2012

Nikos Deja Vu - THE REAL MAN


What is a man?

Is he someone who is strong and tall,
Or is taut and talented as he plays ball?
Is he someone who is hardened and rough,
Who smokes and drinks and swears enough?

Is he someone who chases women hard,
With a quest to conquer, but never dropping his guard?
Is he someone with a good business mind,
Who gets ahead of the others with his nose to the grind?

Or is he someone who tries his best,
Not really caring about any of the rest?
What is a man? Does anyone know?


Who is the prototype? To whom shall I go?

Three Stages of Man

  • Heroic
    (Hyper) Masculinity - Uninitiated: Old male principles.
    Physically hard, dominating, tough, soldier, killer, coercive, controlling, Lord and master, and destructive.
    Emotionally closed, numb, codependent, demanding, aggressive, cynical, sex partner, defensive, repressed, bastard.
    Mentally compartmentalized, penetrating, analytical, splitting, linear, hierarchy, exploitive, rules and laws, doctor.
    Spiritually patriarchal, absolute, uninitiated, immobile, single self, divided, dogma, exclusive, priest.

  • Feminized
    (Hypo) Masculinity - Uninitiated: Traditional male principles.
    Physically soft, submissive, gentle, pacifist, gatherer, pliant, controlled, consort, immobile.
    Emotionally unprotected, flooded, dependent, smothering, passive, naive, pleaser, wounded, contained, nice guy.
    Mentally merged, diffused, synthetic, joining, circular, anarchy, conservative, procedures, magical thinker.
    Spiritually matriarchal, dualistic, seeker, in flight, selfless, disassociated, belief, inclusive, guru.

  • Authentic
    (Integrated) Masculinity - Initiated. Ancient/new male principles.
    Physically flexible, capable, strong, warrior, hunter, firm, vigilant, husband/partner, generative.
    Emotionally receptive, feeling, interdependent, nurturing, assertive, fresh/humorous, lover, deep feeling, wild/playful, fierce.
    Mentally eclectic, insightful, discriminating, holds paradox, holonomic, community, resourceful, personal ethics, healer.
    Spiritually polytheistic, paradoxical, initiated, grounded, braided self, embodied, direct experience, selective, mentor/elder.

If man had been created in Spirit's image, he would be free to be wild without being cruel.
Angry without being violent, sexual without being coercive.
Spiritual without being unsexed and able to truly love.

A Few Good Things About Men

  • Relationship
    Men teach and learn from others.
    Men coach and encourage.
    Men compliment.
    Men are peacemakers and negotiators.
    Men mediate, arbitrate and facilitate.
    Men comfort and nurture.
    Men enjoy solitude and companionship.
    Men are good friends.
    Men can keep a confidence.
    Men are faithful, sincere and decent.
    Men take pride in their achievements.
    Men try to make their community safe.
    Men are philanthropic and generous.
    Men are helpful, kind and thoughtful.
    Men are compassionate and sympathetic.
    Men cheer people up when they are down.
    Men are tender and gentle.
    Men are loving. Men debate and discuss.
    Men like fair play.
    Men like joking with others.
    Men entertain others.
    Men protect and rescue others from harm.
    Men sacrifice themselves for their family.
    Men sacrifice their lives for the greater good.
    Men co-operate.
    Men are good parents.
    Men lead others. Men are patient.
    Men are honorable.
    Men are honest.
    Men create laws to protect others.
    Men are tolerant and accepting of others.
    Men are good listeners.
    Men counsel.
    Men work together in a crisis.
    Men respect themselves and others.
    Men value all life and appreciate nature.

  • Action
    Men are decisive.
    Men get things done.
    Men are practical.
    Men are organizers.
    Men transform.
    Men like to fix things.
    Men motivate and inspire.

  • Expression
    Men are exuberant.
    Men are free-spirited and playful.
    Men are charismatic.
    Men like to celebrate.
    Men are spiritual.
    Men have deep feelings.
    Men are open and expressive.
    Men communicate directly.
    Men are witty.
    Men move people with their words.
    Men are passionate.
    Men enjoy sex.
    Men are artistic.
    Men create and build.

  • Thought
    Men question and seek knowledge.
    Men search for meaning in their lives.
    Men are resourceful, adaptable and flexible.
    Men try to create order in a chaotic world.
    Men are wise and understanding.
    Men like to know how things work.
    Men invent and innovate.
    Men like intellectual games and rules.
    Men hypothesize and solve problems.
    Men are analytical and strategic.
    Men are philosophical.
    Men are planners and forward thinkers.
    Men reason logically.
    Men are smart.
    Men keep things in perspective.
    Men hope for a better world.

  • Strength
    Men are responsible.
    Men provide security and stability.
    Men are self-reliant and independent.
    Men can endure great pain.
    Men can restrain themselves.
    Men are calm in a catastrophe.
    Men are resilient.
    Men are dependable and trustworthy.
    Men are courageous and heroic, Men stand up for what they believe.
    Men are solid, stoical and firm.
    Men fight for a good cause.
    Men are disciplined.
    Men admit to their mistakes.
    Men work with danger, dirt and discomfort.
    Men have stamina, drive and determination.
    Men focus and concentrate.
    Men are hard workers.
    Men use their power for the good of others.

  • Physicality
    Men are physically co-ordinated and agile.
    Men explore and discover.
    Men enjoy physical activity and games.
    Men like clowning around and having fun.
    Men take risks.
    Men like to hone their skills in competition.
    Men are physically strong.

  • A Real Man is:

  1. A real man is wise, yet humble.
  2. A real man is Well Mannered in all life's settings.
  3. A real man would sacrifice everything for his beliefs.
  4. A real man isn't afraid to tell the truth.
  5. A real man is kind, sweet, funny, and loving.
  6. A real man can make you crumble with one glance.
  7. A real man knows he's perfect, but won't ever admit it.
  8. A real man has a smile that lights up a room.
  9. A real man will admit when he's wrong.
  10. A real man won't admit when he's right.
  11. A real man would never say anything that makes you feel like less of a person.
  12. A real man has his beliefs, but would never force them on you.
  13. A real man won't force you to tell him everything, but he's always there if you want to.
  14. A real man will sit with you when you don't feel like "dancing".
  15. A real man will know when to take your hand.
  16. A real man will know when he loves you but won't tell you until he's sure he means it.
  17. A real man will make you want to be a better person.
  18. A real man protects those who cannot protect themselves.
  19. A real man is a polite gentlemen and shows honor.
  20. A real man doesn't blame others for his own problems.
  21. A real man can accept correction.
  22. A real man understands the value of work and is financially responsible.
  23. A real man knows right from wrong and always strives to make virtuous choices.
  24. A real man rejects passivity.
  25. A real man accepts responsibility.
  26. A real man leads courageously.
  27. A real man is respectful to others.
  28. A real man is not afraid to show his Emotions.
  29. A real man is Equally Affectionate & Appreciative to his family.
  30. A real man listens with intent to his wife and kids.

A real man expects the greater reward!

50 + 1 Quotes on Men

  1. I never liked the men I loved and never loved the men I liked. ~ Fanny Brice
  2. You can tell the strength of a nation by the women behind its men. ~ Benjamin Disraeli
  3. Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power. ~ George Bernard Shaw
  4. When men and woman die, as poets sung, his heart’s the last part moves, her last, the tongue. ~ Benjamin Franklin
  5. Passion makes idiots of the cleverest men, and makes the biggest idiots clever. ~ Francois de La Rochefoucauld
  6. If you would convince a man that he does wrong, do right. Men will believe what they see. ~ Henry David Thoreau
  7. All men’s miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone. ~ Blaise Pascal
  8. The world judge of men by their ability in their profession, and we judge of ourselves by the same test: for it is on that on which our success in life depends. ~ William Hazlitt
  9. All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That’s his. ~ Oscar Wilde
  10. God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him. ~ Unknown
  11. Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot. ~ Oscar Wilde
  12. It’s not the men in my life that counts, it’s the life in my men. ~ Mae West
  13. A man may conquer a million men in battle but one who conquers himself is, indeed, the greatest of conquerors. ~ Buddha
  14. Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. ~ Billy Crystal
  15. Men play the game; women know the score. ~ Roger Woddis
  16. Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most times he will pick himself up and carry on. ~ Winston Churchill
  17. There are some sluggish men who are improved by drinking; as there are fruits that are not good until they are rotten. ~ Samuel Johnson
  18. When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself. ~ Louis Nizer
  19. Happy is he who still loves something he loved in the nursery: He has not been broken in two by time; he is not two men, but one, and he has saved not only his soul but his life. ~ Gilbert K. Chesterton
  20. Few men have been admired of their familiars. ~ Michel de Montaigne
  21. Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. ~ Kin Hubbard
  22. If it’s true that men are such beasts, this must account for the fact that most women are animal lovers. ~ Doris Day
  23. All men [are] of one metal, but not in one mold. ~ John Lyly
  24. Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth. ~ Chuck Norris
  25. Adversity makes men, and prosperity makes monsters. ~ Victor Hugo
  26. Men seldom, or rather never for a length of time and deliberately, rebel against anything that does not deserve rebelling against. ~ Thomas Carlyle
  27. Is it not rather what we expect in men, that they should have numerous strands of experience lying side by side and never compare them with each other? ~ George Eliot
  28. A child, from the time he can think, should think about all he sees, should suffer for all who cannot live with honesty, should work so that all men can be honest, and should be honest himself. ~ Jose Marti
  29. The greatest truths are the simplest, and so are the greatest men. ~ Julius Charles Hare
  30. Men are so willing to respect anything that bores them. ~ Marilyn Moroe
  31. There are more men ennobled by study than by nature. ~ Marcus Tullius Cicero
  32. Young men preen. Old men scheme. ~ Mason Cooley
  33. If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman. ~ Margaret Thatcher
  34. A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age. ~ Robert Frost
  35. Classical quotation is the parole of literary men all over the world. ~ Samuel Johnson
  36. Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing. ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes
  37. The desire of excessive power caused the angels to fall; the desire of knowledge caused men to fall. ~ Francis Bacon
  38. Perfect friendship is the friendship of men who are good, and alike in excellence; for these wish well alike to each other qua good, and they are good in themselves. ~ Aristotle
  39. Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable. ~ Cher
  40. There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves. ~ Will Rogers
  41. Priests are not men of the world; it is not intended that they should be; and a University training is the one best adapted to prevent their becoming so. ~ Samuel Butler
  42. Let me embrace thee, sour adversity, for wise men say it is the wisest course. ~ William Shakespeare
  43. Men are only as great as they are kind. ~ Elbert Hubbard
  44. Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn’t seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces. ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh
  45. Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change. ~ Confucius
  46. In the long run, men hit only what they aim at. Therefore, they had better aim at something high. ~ Henry David Thoreau
  47. It is a fact often observed, that men have written good verses under the inspiration of passion, who cannot write well under other circumstances. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
  48. If there is no struggle, there is no progress. Those who profess to favor freedom, and deprecate agitation, are men who want crops without plowing up the ground, they want rain without thunder and lightning. ~ Frederick Douglass
  49. Violent men have not been known in history to die to a man. They die up to a point. ~ Mohandas Gandhi
  50. Great men or men of great gifts you shall easily find, but symmetrical men never. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
  51. The real test of a man is not how well he plays the role he has invented for himself, but how well he plays the role that destiny assigned to him. ~ (My motto)


I Am A Man
I am taught what I am
I live out what I am
I explore what I am
I cannot hide what I am
I am just fine as I am
I am as deep as creation
I am one with creation
I am a man.

** Dedicated to my birthday (January 17th) **

Nikos Deja Vu

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